I generalize my experiences by using the pronoun “you”, but have found more self awareness, connection and possibilities by using “I”.
“I” makes it personal. With “I” there is no abdication of responsibility, or normalization within a sea of humanity. What I am expressing only needs to pertain to me, so I can be very specific and build awareness of my experience without diluting it by thinking about my interpretations of other’s experience.
Including my audience in my statement by using “you”, I impose my experience on them, creating a situation where they might feel defensive, or misunderstood and close down to connection. When I talk about my experience in a personal way, using “I”, others are free to connect with it, or share their own, personal experience.
Universalizing my experience limits its possibilities. The further I generalize my experience the more I need to change before I can conceive of it being different. If I generalize a behavior to all of humanity it is hard to imagine behaving differently while I am a living human being.
Confirmation bias leads me to notice events that reinforce my conclusions and ignore events that contradict them. Instead of fighting confirmation bias I can use language to ensure that my conclusions are confined to the space in which they are accurate instead of confining myself.